"None Of The Above - Tomatoe Potatoe - Hamster In Your Hair" - Tony Mason (1992)
From the album "Tomatoe Potatoe"

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You never told me about the hamster in your hair 
You never mentioned just how long he'd been living there 
Well did you think that I just simply wouldn't care 
Well let me tell you, laaah 

You never told me about the fish fish sticks your ears 
I always thought those earrings looked a little queer 
I talked for hours but you never seemed to hear 
So let me tell you, laaah 

I'm swimming in a bowl of Cheerios 
Trying to escape the evil wrath of your mom
She never liked me anyway 
I'm drowning in a bowl of Cheerios 
Going down again for the last time 

I never told you about the bongoes in my bed 
At night I play the loud enough to wake the dead 
Well maybe this music thing's just going to my head 
I gotta tell you, laaah 

I never told you about the flower up my nose 
It just sits in there and it grows and grows and grows 
It's sometimes hard to breathe but I guess that probably shows 
So let me tell you, laaah 

I'm swimming in a bowl of Cheerios 
Trying to escape the evil breath of your dog 
Dogs never liked me anyway 
I'm drowning in a bowl of Cheerios 
Going down again for the last time 

So I said I'd try and tell you 
All the things I tried to tell you 
But I never seem to tell you anyway 
Sometimes I think I'd like to sell you copies of Rolling Stone 
To help some endless starving children taking drugs 

(insane keyboard solo)

Yes! 
I'm Swimming in a bowl of Cheerios 
Trying to escape the evil wrath of your evil wrath 
And I never liked Cheerios anyway 
I'm drowning in that bowl of Cheerios 
Going down again for the last time